Paradise Lost

As cliche as it is, all good things come to an end. Our 11 night stay on the Gilli island was absolutely incredible but the wheels started to fall off after the 9th night.

Being that most people in this part of the world are Muslim, there are a few things that I found weird but don't care to talk about. I do want to comment about what they are doing to piss me off. Every day there is a loud speaker that blasts out the sound of a man singing. If this man was say, Micheal Buble I wouldn't be able to control myself. However, the voice is similar to the one heard in the Indian song that everyone seems to know and make fun of. Since all the locals on the island wake up at un-godly hour, the first song is played between 4:30 and 5:00am. What the hell do people do so early? The song does not only wake me up but also wakes up the incredibly large population of roosters. You can find these roosters all over the island but they normally like to hang out where tourists are sleeping. All the roosters on the island proceed to cock-a-doodle-do at each other for 45 minutes which should be enough to wake everyone on the island up. But it seems to only wake up babies who then cry for the next half hour. I have nothing against babies but the shrill sound of their cries at this hour in the morning reminds me of someone scratching a chalk board with a nail.

Everyone knows that Muslims are elaborate planners and have worked out a perfect plan to get under my skin. To anyone other than an expert on human behaviour (which I am) they would blame the baby or the parents for that matter. I, however, know to trace back through all the series that lead to me lying awake in my bed from 4-7am.

The morning I made this discovery, we were evicted from our beautiful room because someone made reservations a few months in advance. How anyone other than Veronika and myself know about this diamond in the rough is beyond me. So I started to think about it and came to the conclusion that maybe, just maybe we were being kicked out of the presidential suite because we hadn't paid a dime up until that morning. I have never been kicked out of a place (sober at least) and it was a tough pill to swallow first thing in the morning.

Veronika and I sat down for breakfast, which is provided by the lady who owns the bungalow. The breakfast progressively got worse as the days went on. We still got our eggs and toast but what the hell is the point of having sunny side up eggs if the yolk is cooked solid? Some would call this nit picking but I say those should keep their opinions to themselves. Anyway, the lady offered us the room across the hall for $3 less per night. Veronika wasn't having it and wanted to negotiate so we ended up getting $10 off per night. Scores!!!!!!!! The odd thing was that the lady put up no fight. When negotiating, Asians are known to fight for every 50 cents. I knew something was up.

And my hunch was right. The new room looked like it was at one point a closet and they gave their retarded nephew a bunch of materials and a whole afternoon to turn it into a profitable closet. The result was absolutely incredible. One wall was stone, which we thought was a nice touch, had a head board for our bed which was on a 45 degree angle. Half the head board was attached to the wall while the other was dangling. The 2x4's on the ceiling were crooked so I started to think that this retarded nephew might have been blind as well. The bed was partially inside the room while the part directly under the head board was resting on gravel and soil. The bathroom was a diamond shape. Only issue with this is the dimensions were completely out of whack and every time I used the toilet it felt like I was in a phone booth. The experience very much reminded me of London Pub. This room sucked but we really needed to get to the beach for our after breakfast nap. So we took it for one night.

Later that night our A/C didn't work and our room was hotter than the sun, I'm sure. We decided to play cards outside and take our towel because the only couch in the lobby was being used by an uncle who had no place to stay and used the couch as his home. Veronika grabs the towel and we head out. Then Veronika's bracelet started to move. Then she freaked out and flung her bracelet onto my shorts. Wait a minute. The bracelet was a massive cockroach. I screamed like a girl and wasn't the same for the rest of the night. I enforced the rule that we should sleep with the lights on and in the morning to find a new place to stay for our last night.

Morning came and this time the man singing on the speaker didn't wake me up. I didn't fall asleep. We started to pack and more of the roaches decided to show their face. What purpose do cockroaches serve anyway? Can someone please find out and post it in our comments section? Some big angry spiders also showed up. I have been damaged psychologically. Every time I get dressed now, I make sure to throw my pants and shirt against the wall three times before I stomp on it before I even consider putting the clothes on.

We have since left the island and now find ourselves in some hole in the ground called Sengiggi. It is a road divided into three sections: North, Central and South. I read about it in the Lonely Planet and it was literally described as a ghost town. There are plenty of buildings and shops but they are all boarded up and have long been abandoned by their owners. Veronika and I make up two of the ten travelers currently here.

While looking for a place to stay I came across some grass looking bungalows that wanted $30 per night. "What do you get for $30 per night?" I asked, and the response was "a bed and a fan." In North America that is what you would expect but in Asia there should be a lazy river and a chocolate fountain in my room. And who the hell makes buildings out of grass? Hasn't anyone here read "The 3 Little Pigs"? If the wolf from said story were to find out about Sengiggi, CNN and BBC would have to rip themselves from their 24 hour a day coverage on the global economic crises to cover this tragedy.

We wanted to book a 3 day volcano trek from Sengiggi and decided to read a few brochures about it provided at the travel agency. Normally brochures really embellish how great things are, which is a good strategy to help sales. This brochure took the opposite approach. One portion of the brochure read: " Every 3 feet we moved up we slid 1 foot back. The gravel is like walking in bean paste and the ice cold winds make it difficult to look up. When you finally make it to the volcano's summit in a frozen stiff and exhausted state you will rest for an hour and watch the sunrise."

We for some reason inquired about the price and were told that it was $200 US. Sign me up!

Needless to say we are leaving this hell hole first thing int he morning and will not look back.

Love,


Marc


P.S. I would like to apologize to all of the following, if they happen to still be reading this:

Muslims
Asians
retarded nephews
the people of Sengiggi for tipping of the wolf that will wreak havoc
Muslim roosters
babies

Some thoughts by Marc

Much to popular demand and numerous emails, I am back. Thank you to everyone who wrote to me, your emails were all touching. We are still on the Gilli island with absolutely no intention on leaving anytime soon. Our lives have become very simple. We wake up, go to the beach and sleep then we go out partying with the people we have made nice with on the island. Since it has been so long I have a few things to write about.

Yesterday we rented a boat for the day so we can go fishing and snorkeling. Veronika organized the entire thing and what started out as a fishing trip for 8 people turned into a boat party of 14 (Germany, England, Sweden, Canada, Indonesia and US). Some of the guys started fishing but we soon found it a lot more fun to jump off the top deck into the water. We caught one lousy fish and gave it to the family that works at the hotel. It was a good day and by far the best experience of the trip so far.

A couple of nights ago we had a beach party with our friends and needless to say there was a lot of drinking. It was getting late so Veronika and I decided to go get some noodles. We walked with our friend Eric and stumbled (literally) on a little cafe where a bunch of locals were watching TV. Veronika confirmed that they have noodles and we both walked in. I turned to ask Eric to join us and his eyes were wide, almost terrified to go in. At the same time he used his eyes to suggest that we shouldn't eat there either. It's too bad I couldn't translate what he was trying to say. Veronika and I sat down and I found the situation hilarious. Veronika and I walk into a cafe (where they also live) at 2am. We were covered in dirt and sweating profusely (just left the beach after looking for glow in the dark shrimp). We demanded they make us noodles and we got rice. I was absolutely disgusted and refused to eat it. Instead, I moved the rice around my plate trying to make it look like I actually ate. The locals were watching us the whole time.

Veronika mentioned the day trip we took to the coffee plantation and the volcano in Bali. I would like to say that yes the volcano was a beautiful site but if it's not erupting, isn't it just a mountain. Big deal right? I was secretly hoping that it would erupt while we ate our lunch. It would have been of no danger to us as we were several kilometres away and pretty high up in the hills. The cat that takes a dump and they make into coffee got me thinking about business opportunities when I get back. I would choose not use cats (they are reincarnated bad souls) feces. It is brilliant really. Buy a pet and you use it's feces to make coffee that you can call a delicacy and you can sell it to tourists.

On the ferry over here there was a group of people travelling with us, majority are Australian. Veronika and I both agree that Aussies behave like a bunch of rowdy Americans in Mexico during spring break. Anyway, we were a few hours into our ferry ride when a foursome of Aussies came up to our deck. The deck we chose was for the people that wanted to read and sleep. It was not the Aussie deck. The leader of the group was an intimidating guy. He was big, with a fake Mohawk. You know the ones the shave their heads on 2 different setting to make it look like a Mohawk. I'm pretty sure David Beckham made this haircut popular in the late 90's. So this guy and his stupid haircut are wandering around looking for a place for him and his "mates" to sit. He finds a table near us with only 2 chairs. There was a couple that were sleeping right beside them and happened to be using two chairs to rest their feet on. It was like watching a car wreck, I couldn't look away. This guy wakes the couple up and asks if they are using the chairs. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????????? The people were completely shocked and still half asleep so they gave the goof their chairs.

Finally he and his mates can have a seat. I really didn't want these guys on our deck but they would have kicked the crap out of me. If we weren't on a boat I would have smacked one of them with great confidence that I can out run them and hide somewhere. But on a boat, it's too risky. The leader with the faux hawk pulls out an old portable CD player while huge speakers. Not only is his haircut out of date but so are his electronics. I bet this guy has the biggest VHS collection going today.

He puts a burned CD in and presses play. Out comes Bon Jovi. Not any Bon Jovi but all of their slow jams. A group of four bad ass looking Aussies sitting around a table listening to "Bed of Roses" Three of them sat still staring at each other, the leader was playing air drums....To "Bed of Roses"!!!!!! I know that Bon Jovi has a big fan base but I always thought that it was women that were fans. More specifically women that were between the ages of 18-25 during Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet tour.

ummmm. that's it

P.S the picture is not us - we dont have a camera

Paradise

I know it has been a very long time since we've written here. The internet connection is very slow here.


Right now we are in the Gilli islands. If there was one place that I visited that I can stay at forever, this would be it. This island is just East of Bali and it is located on the top right hand side of Lombok. If you look at the world map you cant see these three islands because the biggest one is 3km wide. All the hotels, restaurants, bars and activities are located around the island on the beach. There is one main street where everyone walks past. The town population is less than 800 people but no one really knows for sure. All the locals know each other and when there is a new face they make sure to make them feel welcome and at home. Their English is the best we heard in our travels which makes communication easy and very interesting. This island really is paradise. It is its own magical island that is not connected with the outside world. They don't have any cell phones, cars or motorbikes on this island. The only method of transportation is a Ferrari with one horse power. That is what they refer to their horse and carriage. This method of transportation is only used by very lazy tourists and to distribute goods that arrive by boat for restaurants and bars. We rented bicycles (mine had a little basket) to see the island.

We met a lot of people here and we see them daily. Its like a small high school where everyone has seen each other around and knows their whereabouts. I even met a lot of young adults traveling alone from Moscow. One girl is a dive instructor here. Marc has set up daily poker tournaments at 4pm and he won the first one, which is nice that he is bringing in some income. Every night there is a different bar that is having a party, and people are really friendly and get to know one another during the night. Last night we went to a ladies night which means that girls get free drinks. We saw one guy at the bar wearing a dress and I had to find out why. He said that it is ladies night and he came for free drinks. He couldn't walk at the end of the night and all for free. Apparently this wasn't his first time.

We are staying in a local Indonesian house. The owners have only four rooms to let out. This family like many others here are very welcoming. We spend a lot of time talking to them and relating on many fronts. Their way of life may seem so beautiful and worry free while in reality it is very bitter sweet. I find it very sad that more than half the kids are not it school and they have to start work as early as five years old. Its also really sad that medical services must be paid from their pocket and they don't have any insurance. Most of the people on the island have two jobs, they work every single day with no exception. Still they cannot afford to buy or rent a house and end up sleeping on the floor or a couch at a hotel. In return for having a place to sleep, as a third job they help the owners of the hotel by bringing tourists that don't have reservations. I like this one family so much that I have offered to help to add them to a popular booking web site to generate more revenue for their hotel.

At Gilli there is one power generator. The power goes out daily sometimes for 3 hours sometimes 12. I didn't mind this to be such a big deal until we were watching a very interesting movie in our room and just as the movie reached its climax the power went out. I will have to wait to see what happens.

Before we got to the Gilli islands Marc and I did a day tour of Bali. We saw a local temple built for a king, went to a silver making factory, Monkey forest, coffee plantation, and a mountain top to see a volcano.
Silver Factory: it was odd because they walked us through the factory and we literally watched over peoples shoulder while they were working. I felt really uncomfortable by this and the people were pretty upset to be disturbed from their work. However, we later went to their showroom and bought two pairs of earrings. I already lost one of the earing and have one wearable pair left. This always happens to me where i lose one earring so I figured the next pair I get will be glued to my ear, this way I can't lose it.
Monkey Forest: very beautiful forest with more than 1000 monkeys. The monkeys were trained hustlers. They climbed on your shirt and grabbed over priced bananas right out of your hand. I tried to give the bananas to the baby monkeys but the older ones were quite quick and aggressive and let me know that I was in the wrong. Marc also had an interesting experience with a monkey. As he was trying to hide the bananas in his backpack the monkey jumped on his back and grabbed the stack right out of his hands.
Coffee Plantation: was a hoax. The tour of the coffee grounds and plantation consisted of one man that was frying the beans in a pot while right next to it was a coffee bean bag of ready coffee. If you have any questions you should visit the gift shop they said to buy the coffee and try it at home. Nevertheless we were quite intrigued by one of the coffees that they had. There is a small cat like animal that lurks in the bushes of this plantation. It eats the coffee leafs and when it craps (excuse the language) the workers pick it up, process it in their pot and sell it. This coffee is very expensive, because the animal is very small therefore its waste is small as well. Marc and I didn't try this coffee but I did see a lot of Russians buying this coffee and referring to it as an Indonesian delicatessen to bring back home.
Mountain Top: this was a very beautiful place. It overlooked a volcano, a river and popular temple. Unfortunately our camera broke and we couldn't take any pictures. We did find out that they have a trek atop the actual volcano that starts at 1am to watch the sunrise. Once we go back to Bali we will do the trek and take a lot of pictures.

Our plan right now is to avoid flying back to Thailand due to the situation there and we are trying to change our ticket for direct flight from Bali to London with stopover in Bangkok (only airport). In the mean time we are staying here and have no plans to return to Thailand.

P.S Marc had a very funny idea that I must share. The public bathrooms here smell very bad. The idea was to capture this smell in an air freshner and sell it to the homesick Asian community in Toronto. I don't know, but there might be something to it.

Bali - Indonesia

Wow Bali, what a change from Vietnam. The airport is located on a beach. It was a very good thing that our pilot knew what he was doing because an inch off and we would have landed in the water. Bali is very beautiful: its sunny, rich with colorful architecture, exotic trees and flowers, people are smiling, the sand is white and the water is crystal clear. Most of the tourists are from Australia and Netherlands. There are very few Canadians in this area (its very far from Canada). We are staying a short walk from the beach and our hotel has a very nice pool. Including breakfast we are paying $25 per night, we were very happy with this deal. Our plan is too see a few more islands, a volcano, wild animals, a few temples, the mountains and maybe maybe try surfing.

Last night we had sushi for dinner. We were both really craving it, there are very few sushi restaurants that we have seen so far. Our dinner cost us three times what we paid for one nights accommodation and it was mediocre. When I get home from the airport I already have a plan. I will stop at country style for coffee and a bagel with cream cheese (I have not seen one bagel or cream cheese here) and then I'm going to a sushi restaurant. After this trip I have definitely come to the conclusion that Toronto has the best food and fairly close to authentic cuisine from abroad.

We want to wish everyone who is celebrating a happy Easter and a happy Passover. Were sad to miss the Casimiri Easter celebration. I'm sure Charlene and Vanessa cooked a very delicious and hearty meal (I hope without any explosions this time :) ) Let us know how it went. I'm also very sad to miss my family celebration dinner. I miss home cooking and my family very much.

P.S - After rereading this blog I realized how much of it was concentrated around food and I realized that its dinner time!!! I will leave you now and hope to hear from you soon!

Malaysia - Toronto?

Marc and I have safely landed in Kuola Lumpar, capitol of Malaysia. We are staying in china town. This city is very similar to Toronto. The buildings are tall and the people are from everywhere in the world. They have people from the phillipines, all over asia, arabic, india, pakistan, and so on and so forth. We saw the sites yesterday and even ran into a group of sailors from Pakistans, the pictures are amazing and im looking for a place i can put them up quickly. Tomorrow we leave for Bali and will update with a better blog once we are there.

Kissess

Just an update

Were back in Hanoi from out travels up north. Wow Sapa the mountains were beautiful and we took an overnight train there and back and slept on bunk beds. It was really fun and very interesting to learn about the culture of the Coh Lao people. They are a tribe of 400 people who have lived in the mountains, farming their own food and totally separate from any civilization. They wear traditional costumes. They marry each other based on the year they were born in for example I'm 1981 year of the buffalo. I would need to marry someone who matches my year if I lived in that tribe. Very bizarre. They don't go to the hospital but rather use traditional medicines to heal one another. More than half the kids dont attend school, its their parents choice and often they choose to have their kids help them sell and beg. They walk 12 km to Sapa daily to sell their bags and other useless stuff they make. The interesting thing is that women are the ones who are breadwinners while stay at home to raise the children and farm the land. We noticed that they have a lot of cute puppies running around but very few older dogs. We inquired and wished we didn't. When the dog reaches around 1 years old... yes they eat them.

We then came back Halong Bay. We were on a boat overnight and sailed to an island called Cabata. There we hiked through a few caves that were thousands of years old. We kayaked into a lagoon, and ate a lot of seafood. The trip was really fun except the weather was rainy. Vietnam is a beautiful country but like we mentioned earlier the people are getting to us. So we are happy to leave.

We changed out itinerary because we didn't want to go to Laos, it was difficult to get there from Hanoi and a lot of people had not the best things to say about it. We did hear great things about Bali Indonesia instead. After careful research and budged examination we decided that we can squeeze it in. We booked our tickets to Bali and we are leaving tomorrow. We will have a stop over in Malaysia for a few days in the capitol city Kaula Lampur. We are very excited about these plans and cant wait to get out of here.

Marc and I definately cought the traveling bug. We love it and now just want to go to every country in the world (not on this trip). We met so many people and we learn so much from each person we met. On the boat there was a couple from Poland, they were our age and the girl spoke Russian. She worked in Ukraine and Moscow and told me so much about these countries. I got to speak Russian for the first time on this trip which was amazing and to my surprise I'm still pretty good. We were having a conversation about Poland joining the European union in 2004 and how a lot of Polls (polish people) left the country to work in the United Kingdom. I actually knew from speaking with Irish people we met previously that Northern Ireland is part of the United Kingdom and I was so proud to have such knowledge. I already feel that I have learned so much and grown as an individual on this trip. Besides now we have many places to stay around the world for example: Poland, Denver Colorado, England, and Amsterdam.

We read your emails and we are so happy to hear from you. Please keep them coming. We miss you all terribly and cant wait to come back to the best country in the world!!!